I officiated a wedding at sunrise. Then the wind hit.

Hi Reader,

I'm back from Burning Man.

Out there, they call everywhere else “the default world,” with the assumption being that for one week a year, a small spot in the Nevada desert is the real thing, and the rest of life is just... default.

I get it. And...I'm not ready to accept this binary. My life outside the gates is full of real meaning too. My marriage, my community, the men, women and couples I get to sit with. I didn't leave something more alive for something less.

What I did find out there, though, was something my life used to have more of: a feeling of summer camp. The place where everyone is welcomed and celebrated exactly as they are.

The weather was anything but welcoming, with windstorms, rain, heat and cold.

But for my first Burn, it was an experience that will stick with me long after the laundry is cleaned.

I officiated a wedding at sunrise.

I sang in the choir at a Shabbat service.

I served pizza to hungry souls.

Leslie and I taught twice: “Your Partner Is Not MOOP” and a new one, “Your Relationship Is In the Dust.”

And more than once, when the winds picked up and so did the emotions, we had to actually practice everything we teach, in real time, with no room to fake it.

There wasn't a beat to explain myself or manage her reaction. There was just Own → Return → Repair: notice what's actually mine, come back to her before I disappear into being right, repair before the moment hardens into a story we tell about each other. No workshop, no whiteboard. Just the practice, live, in a dust storm.

That's the part I keep thinking about.

Everything gets amplified out there, and relationships get tested in ways that don't often happen when everything else is as usual.

Whether you were in the desert or not last week, Leslie and I are inviting you to join us for a free session on Thursday, September 17, from 6–7:30pm PT: "When the Dust Settles."

It's for couples and those traveling this world solo, because you don't have to go to Burning Man for life and relationships to get dusty.

On a different note...

While I was gone, the door opened on something I've been building for months: The Wisdom Circle's new 7-month cohort, starting October 7 in Redwood City.

It's one of the places where I get to create the kind of honest, grounded community I was reminded of at Burning Man. It's a place for men to slow down, tell the truth, practice something different, and be witnessed by other men who are doing the same.

The group meets monthly in person, with online sessions and small-group calls in between.

And this year there's something new: a 4-day Intensive retreat in the Santa Cruz Mountains, November 12–15. You can join the Intensive on its own, or make it part of your Wisdom Circle experience.

If you're considering the retreat, the current enrollment rate is available through September 30.

With blessings to you,

Ted

P.S. A Sacred Journey Into Intimacy is in 2 weeks and we still have a few spots available. This is a one-of-a-kind day for couples who are ready for breakthroughs and tools to grow closer together.